First, I
just wanted to thank my readers for the thoughtful comments they left for me
over the weekend when I shared about some stuff that was making me feel
uncertain about where I was as a writer. You guys are really AWESOME!
Today is
Insecure Writer Support Group day. Thanks to Alex Cavanaugh for hosting.
A year
ago from today, Ray Bradbury passed away. He is still missed. His writing has
always pushed me to think about topics that many people prefer to overlook-
xenophobia and the suppression of free speech, for example. Here's one quote of Mr. Bradbury that I reach for on
days when I remind myself why it's important for me to stand by my values:
“You have to know how to accept rejection and reject acceptance.”
Many of
us are taught that rejection is a part of life (especially if you're a writer!)
and that we should accept rejection with grace. The idea of knowing when and how to reject
acceptance is less common. But this is a very important awareness to have,
especially when winning the approval of someone or something comes with a price
tag or an unspoken agreement that you must leave part of who you are at the
door when you walk into the Mansion of Conditional Acceptance.
Please take my word for it when I say that at the Mansion of Conditional
Acceptance, the wine sucks. And it's okay to spit out bad wine, and walk
out.
(That's just one example of how Mr. Bradbury's words have encouraged me to think.)
Have you
ever rejected acceptance?
25 comments:
I wrote a guest post this week about how rejection is character-building. I think there have actually been times when I've rejected acceptance - I think it helps to have a firm grasp of who you are and what your beliefs are.
Yes, we can't embrace acceptance if we have to give up something important about ourselves. I've never really thought about it before. Mostly it's been how to deal with rejections.
Huh, this might be good advice for me today. I have a phone call with my new editor later over final revisions on my manuscript. My husband cautioned me not to be so eager to please that I give in on everything just to win her acceptance. I may be in error on some things, and I may have to compromise, but if something feels wrong on a gut level, I need to stand my ground.
Thanks for the timely post!
Agreed. I've given in to gain acceptance before and felt like a total chode after the fact. Stay true to your work; it'll stay true to you!! Great post!
When there are conditions, it's not really acceptance, right? We should never compromise.
Oooh! Thought provoking topic, my dear. I shall put that in my back pocket for safe-keeping.
~Just Jill
Well it depends on the amount of dough, if I'd compromise or not haha but yeah it isn't something I'd do for many a thing.
I haven't thought about it. But it wouldn't hurt some people to do that more often, then they wouldn't have an overinflated ego. lol
I never thought of it quite that way before - rejecting acceptance. I've done it, but it was rarely easy and it felt like I was "fighting against" instead of "choosing to reject." Great post!
There is a lot of discernment in both and a lot of self-talk and evaluation-- when it's time to compromise and when it's not. I agree, acceptance sometimes comes with a price. Rejection can be rolled with a bit easier I think.
What a great, inspirational quote. Thank you for sharing it. I'm still learning to accept rejection. My skin isn't thick enough for it yet. I'll get there soon enough, I'm sure.
LoL, what a great quote! It puts things into perspective. Thanks for sharing Ray Bradbury's wise words!!
Happy reading and writing! from Laura Marcella @ Wavy Lines
Great post. I've learned to accept rejection, almost expect it, but have a harder time rejecting acceptance. You've really provided food for thought. Thanks for sharing. Enjoyed your post, am now a follower.
Any kind of acceptance that means leaving my true self behind is something I'd immediately reject. Ray was a wise man.
Interesting question. It is probably easier to accept rejection than reject acceptance. Something to think about. :)
Ah, good point...knowing how to accept rejection could make a huge difference now and in the future.
Thank for popping by and telling me comments didn't work!
I've seen people who tried so hard to fit their manuscripts to someone else's idea of good that they ended up completely ruining it. Rejecting acceptance is important.
wow, that is an excellent thought to ponder!!!
Hey, Cynthia. To answer your question on my blog. I won't be going to SCBWI LA this year. Because I now write NA, I won't be renewing my SCBWI when it expires later this year. My RWA membership is enough for me. :)
hmm - did you plan for this post to drop right before I meet with my critique group? ha!
Definitely something to ponder.
Rejecting acceptance - interesting idea. Kind of reminds me of that quote "I wouldn't belong to any club that would have me as a member" (Oscar Wilde?)
My boys tell me that I don't freely accept compliments; yet accepting rejection is much more difficult. Thanks for reminding me that I have to work on both areas!
Julie
Thanks for commenting, everyone! I'm glad my post helped you think!
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